"Shlach Lecha (Anashim)"

25-Jun-06

"Shlach Lecha (Anashim)"

Translation: Send "for yourself" men, Hashem tells Moshe Rabeinu. The land of Israel was meant for the Jews, Hashem promised it to our ancesters Avrum, Yitzchok, and Yaakov. Now it was time for the Jews to enter Eretz Yisroel as Hashem had promised. However, rather than trusting in G-D, the Jews began to doubt him. Despite G-D's promise to the Jews that he would give them Eretz Yisroel, and that the land will yield an abudance amount of fruit, grains, and natural resources, some there and some hidden, the Jews wanted spies to check out the land for them and report back the results. By doing so, they displayed a lack of faith in G-D. They feared that upon hearing the Jews would populate the land of Israel, the gentiles would hide all their valuable assets underground so that they would not find them. The Jews therefore approached Moshe Rabainu about sending spies to report back on the condition and hidden treasures of the holy land. Upon hearing the Jews argument, Moshe Rabainu thought they had a valid point. He went to Hashem and asked him what he thought about sending men of importance to spy on the land of Israel. G-D responded that it is a display of lack of faith by the Jews, and that it was not the first time the Jews didn't have faith in him. This made G-D very angry. However, G-D allowed Moshe Rabeinu to choose 1 man from each tribe to scout the land so that the Jews would not think Hashem was not keeping his promise to them.

Why did G-D want 1 man from every tribe? so that when they report back positivley or negatively on the land, they will be judged and punished or rewarded accordingly. As we know, most of the 12 spies reported back negative things about Eretz Yisroel. Only Kalev ben Yefune and Yeoshua Bin Nun reported back positively about the land of Israel. The torah uses the word "Anashim" which is indicative of people of stature and importance. These spies that Moshe Rabeinu selected with permission from G-D, were very respectable people. They were wise, had leadership skills, and were non-currupted. That's how these men were when they left on their journey. When they returned however, they came back different. They were now men of curruption and evil. They were overtaken by their power and pride and became men of falshood and dishonor.

Power can currpt a person to the negative extreme. We saw it by the Meraglim, and we are seeing it today in our surroundings and the world we live in. The current bleak situation of child abuse, both sexual and physical has grown rampant in our yeshiva's today. Were it not for the power of the Internet, some of this abuse may well still be taking place. We are fortounate to have this venue so as not to allow the Margulies's of the world to cover up the abuse by keeping the perp (RUBbe Kolko) around so he can continue to molest for 4 decades, and by running a campaign of corruption and intimidation against victims and their parents.

Lippy boy, may have once upon a time garnished the Kovod of some people, before he became ruthless with his corruption and lies. Now, this 80 something year old is in shambles. He has a lot of answering to do up there. Lippy boy, should do what he should have done a while ago if he wants to save any face, and that's firing himself from running TT.

This just in:

New Yeshiva opening up featuring -----

The Co-Principals

Lippy Boy Margulis and Jack the Sadist Mandel.

==== Specialized individual attention for every boy. We Guarantee it! ====

"The RUBeim"

Harav Yudel "the RUBbe" Kolko and Harav Yudel "the groper" Nussbaum

We believe in keeping your children safe from harm and have chosen the above esteemed and experienced RUBbeim to watch over your children and to service them, so that they recieve the proper Chinuch and education they so deserve!

You... Come read from the Chumash

Let us try to put ourselves in the shoes of a 5th grader who was sexually molested and abused by "Rabbi" Yehuda Nussbaum. Let's try to imagine how this 10 year old boy felt. Think about what you would do if you were that 5th Grade boy. Would you be scared? Would you feel ashamed to tell anyone that your rebbe is putting his hands on your genitals? how do you tell anyone that your rebbe is groping you, it's too embarrassing? He's your Rebbe afterall you reason, aren't rebbe's supposed to be good people? Especially this rebbe, he has credentials to check Shatnez no less. He davens with his eyes closed while shaking his head and looking up to the sky. When the designated boy was chosen to lead the Bracha's and were up to the part of "Asher Nosan Lasechvi Bina Leavin Bain Yom Uvein lyla, the rebbe would say it with real Kavona, yelling it out loud. He must be a "Tzadik" you would think to yourself.

He was such a "Tzadik" that he would preach and berate any boy who wasted paper towels. If you washed your hands for netilas yadyim by breakfast or lunch and didn't use every inch of the paper towel, he would scream at you. Same for blowing your nose. You would be in the small basement eating breakfast or lunch and getting served our portions by an elderly man (Mr. Berger), and where a small little tiny office stood next to the 7th grade classroom, and this 5rth grade Rebbe would have his eyes peeled like a hawk on any boy who does wrong.

He was such a holy rebbe, that he was known to go around with a very used up paper towel in which he would fold in 100 different directions, trying to use up any left dry spots to blow his nose into. How could such a rebbe do any wrong, right? This 5th grade boy is distraught, what does he do? Who does he turn to? Who does he trust?

He is very scared now, he needs his Mommy. He's afraid to go to class, he doesn't want his Rebbe to put his hands inside his underwear anymore and feel down there. Should he tell his parents? What if they don't believe him? What if they get angry with him? What if they think it's his fault? By now, this vibrant and smart young boy makes a decision. He's going to tell his Parents what his rebbe is doing to him. He's going to be strong.

Ashamed, he tells his parents about learning "Chumash" in his class. I don't like learning chumash because that is when my rebbe calls me up to the front of the class to read out loud from the Chumash. When I go up to my rebbe's desk, he wraps his arms around my body and pulls me closer to him, his beard rubbing against my face. He kisses me on my forhead and cheeks. He tells me to read a Pusik out loud in the chumash. I begin reading. I'm trying to concentrate but my Rebbe is feeling inside my pants. He's fondling my genitals and holding me close to his body the whole time, I could barely even move. I just wanted to stand away from him and read, but he would pull me closer to him, sometimes seating me on his lap. I'm scared of him Mommy, I don't like my rebbe. He hits the boys hard with a ruler if you're not good. He tells you to open your hand and then he hits you real hard. It hurts. If you close your hand he hits your knuckles. How many times did his Rebbe molest him, his parents ask? At least on 3 different occasions, mabey more, he doesn't remember all the times.

Don't worry son, his parents tell him. We are going to make sure that your rebbe gets in trouble for what he did to you. Your Rebbe is not going to do that to you ever again son, he's reassured by his parents. You did nothing wrong. Your Rebbe did a terrible thing to you. We are so sorry you were hurt. We love you.

His Mother is crying. his father is shaken.

This is disgusting! I have tears in my eyes writing all this.

More to come:

Urgent! Shlomo Mandel of YOB contact me at: matzil_nefoshos@yahoo.com This is your final Hazmana!

Our intent is NOT to bring down Yeshiva of Brooklyn or any other Yeshiva. However, we will not hesitate for a second to do so, if we are left with no other choice. Protecting our children comes before anything else, and we will make every effort to reinforce that position. We cannot permit this endless cycle of abuse to continue.

That being the case, we cannot continue allowing YOB to shelter Yehuda Nussbaum at the expense of our children. As Jews we have that responsibility, obligation, and duty, to insure the saftey and welfare of our children. It is sad that many educaters and "Rabonim" have failed terribly in this area. The abuse of children and the sheltering of the abuser by their bosses, is not a parctice of Judasim, It is a practice of Fakeism!

Please Help Stop Child Abuse, Start By knowing the facts!

Let us focus on the task of preventing other children from being molested by "Rabbi's" such as Yudi Kolko of Yeshiva Torah Temima, and Yehuda Nussbaum of Yeshiva Of Brooklyn. There are many people out there who are either very ignorant, very stupid, or both.

For example, some will use the following flawed defense: Why are we only now hearing about sexual abuse of children that took place over 25 years ago? It must be the accusers have an agenda against the accused they naivley conclude. It must be the accusers are just out to ruin these people's names, they must all be lying that they were molested.

However, let's educate these misguided minds.

FACT: Unfortunately, most of today's children will never tell anyone they were sexually abused. They feel ashamed that this has happened to them. In many cases they are protecting their abuser because he or she is part of their family. They are protecting other members of their family - saving them from the pain of knowing.

Therefore, it is quite understandable that we are now hearing about the abuse that took place as long as 25 years ago. It is through the courageous efforts of one of Yudi Kolko's victims, who was able to expose this FRAUD of a "Rabbi" Yudi Kolko, for what he is, a child molester who was shielded and harbored all these years by Yeshiva Torah Temima, the same way Yeshiva Of Brooklyn continues to harbor their Child Molester, "Rabbi" Yehuda Nussbaum AKA Shatnez Checker, all of these years.

What are the first three facts you can tell others?

Fact one: Today, 95 percent of child molestation can be prevented. We have the knowledge to stop it. "Rabbi" Lipa Margulis could have and should have fired Yudi Kolko decades ago but did not. "Rabbi" Yakov Mandel should have fired "Rabbi" Yehuda Nussbaum many years ago but did not. In both cases, beacuse these child molester's were not given the boot, their bosses will have a lot of answering to do to Hashem and to all of the victims who were abused by these "Rabbi's".

Fact two: Today, living in the United States, there are 39 million adults who have survived child sexual abuse.
Fact three: Today, more than three million American children are victims. Most of them are children, struggling alone, believing there is no adult who can help them. To help prevent child molestation from happening to the children closest to you, begin by telling others the basic facts.

But why you? Shouldn't stopping sexual abuse be left to professionals - physicians and therapists? Better yet, shouldn't the police and the courts take care of it?

Professionals - physicians and therapists - can never put an end to sexual abuse; neither can the police or the courts. Why? Because they come on the scene too late. By the time they get there, the children have already been molested. Only you can get there in time.

There's a bigger reason why the professionals and the courts can't put an end to sexual abuse. They have no permission to talk to a child about sex - unless, of course, they talk to the child after the fact, after the child has already been sexually abused or has abused another child. Only you can talk to your children before anything happens, before any damage is done - to anyone.

Not In My Family

What if you are certain there has never been a child molester or a molested child in your family? You are probably wrong.

In spite of the millions of victims in our families, many people stick to their mistaken belief that child molestation has nothing to do with them.

An estimated one in 20 teenage boys and adult men sexually abuse children, and an estimated one teenage girl or adult woman in every 3,300 females molests children. Although that's well over five million people, most families mistakenly believe that as far as molesters go, there has never been one in their family, and what's more, there never will be. Add together the child victims, the adult survivors, and the abusers, and that's 15 out of every 100 Americans who have been either a molested child or a molester.

Telling Others The Facts

If we're going to protect our children from sexual abuse, all of us have to understand exactly what we mean by the act of sexual abuse. Why? Because one of the greatest obstacles we face is people's fear of the facts about child molestation.

For instance, some people who have no idea that sexual touch is vastly different from hugging are afraid to hug a child - especially one who isn't theirs - because someone might think they are child molesters. You can calm their fears by telling them this fact: Hugging is not molesting. Sexual touch is when an adult fondles the child's chest, buttocks, or genitals with the direct purpose of sexually exciting himself or the child.

Can you tell your husband that fact? Can you tell your sister, your cousin, or your best friend? If you can, then you can easily tell others all the rest of the facts.

The less people know, the more anxiety they feel, and the more they want to run away or pretend that today's estimated three million sexually abused children don't exist. Every fact has a calming effect. By telling the people closest to you the facts, you can help those same people become strong adult protectors of the children closest to you.

How Many Children Are Sexually Abused?

Three million children! I don't believe it. How can you possibly know that there are exactly three million child victims?" As you begin to tell others the facts, this is the first question they may ask you. The answer: Of course, we don't know exactly.

Children seldom tell. Those millions of children are a secret. They are the secret in family after family after family. Even adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse seldom tell. What we do know from studies of adult men and women is that the number is at least three million. At least three million children are molested before they finish their 13th year. In 1998, there were 103,000 reported and confirmed cases of child molestation. For comparison, at the height of the polio epidemic that struck children in the 1950s, there were 21,000 cases reported in a year. For rubella, there were 57,000 cases reported. For child molestation, those numbers of reported and confirmed molestations are only the tip of the iceberg. For every case reported there are at least two and maybe three more cases that never get reported.

That's why we may never know the exact number of child victims. We do know that if we use the conservative estimate that two in every ten little girls and one in every ten little boys are victims (based on the population reported in the 1999 U.S. Census statistical abstract) well over three million children are victims.

Take a moment to think about that. Three million children is a staggering number of children. That's 46 National Football League stadiums packed with children who are, today, being sexually abused, and who believe they have no adult to go to for help. The Victims are terriffied. Should he tell Mommy/Daddy? What if his parents don't believe him? What if they say it's his fault that it happened? In most cases, the victims will never tell anyone of the sexual abuse they suffered as a child, even after reaching adulthood.

How Severe is the Damage?

Some people will foolishly say that sexually touching a child does no harm. Some adults will even tell boy victims to "act like a man" and "stop whining." Other adults are unsympathetic about the experiences of adult survivors. They will say that, no matter what happened in childhood, that is the past. You're an adult now, so get over it.

The facts are that sexual abuse does harm the child and that the damage often carries over into the child's adult life.

Studies show that this damage can include:

* difficulty in forming long-term relationships;
* sexual risk-taking that may lead to contracting sexually transmitted diseases, including AIDS;
* physical complaints and physical symptoms;
* depression, suicidal thoughts, and suicide;
* links to failure of the immune system and to increases in illnesses, hospitalizations, and early deaths.


In addition to the tangible physical and emotional damage that sexual abuse does to the child, that terrible secret that is held so close by two or three family members can go on to tear at the fiber of the family in generation after generation.

Who Is The Child Molester? Who Causes So Much Damage To Our Children?

We want to introduce you to a sexual abuser of children. Keep in mind that far more men than women are abusers. In fact, approximately one out of 20 men, and approximately one out of 3,300 women are sexual abusers of children. Let's look at a man who has molested children. We'll call him George.

George's Story

George was a typical teenager. In his twenties, George emerged from his shell, got married, and had two sons. His parents were proud of him, of the family he had established, of the values he taught his children.

During his thirties, he was promoted to a new position in his company every two or three years. More money, more responsibility, more travel, more stress.

One day when George was on the road, his wife got a call. Her husband was three states away. He'd been arrested in that state for child molestation. By now George was 43.

His wife remembers smiling into the phone. She had a flash image - her telling the story about this mistake. "Can you imagine? Poor George, - the most conservative man in the world." - and how their friends would laugh. She repeated her husband's name, including middle name. She spelled out the first, middle, and last name. His wife was sure it was somebody else with a similar name. After she was convinced that her husband was the George in custody, her next emotion was fury. Who would falsely accuse a fine man like her husband? Would the lawyer's fees bankrupt them? What would his boss say? After 20 years of marriage she knew George, knew he was the last man in the world who would ever. . . .

But did she know George?

Like most people, George's wife, when she considered child molestation at all - thought about it only as a sin or a crime. Her husband was simply not a criminal. He had never even had a traffic ticket. He was a regular hardworking man with a great sense of responsibility. If anything, he was a law-and-order guy. He was, like many husbands, concerned for his family's safety. He was their protector.

His religion was an important part of his life. Their religious beliefs were important to both of them and to their children.

And besides that George couldn't be a child molester, she thought, because they had a vigorous and happy sex life.

Through the months that followed, George's wife and his parents received several shocks. He confessed. Yes, he had sexually molested the 10-year-old girl who accused him, the daughter of a man who'd been his friend since high school. Then she found out there had been other victims. He had molested 23 little girls. The number included two nieces, one the daughter of his wife's sister and, the other the daughter of his own sister. He had also molested several daughters of close friends. His two nieces he had molested over a period of years. Both nieces kept the secret from everybody in the family. In a further shock to his family, he also confessed that when he was 17 and she was in grade school, he had repeatedly molested his stepsister. She also never told.

George's larger family is, of course, destroyed. Neither his sister nor his sister-in-law will ever forgive him for sexually abusing their daughters. They also shun his wife. No matter what she says about her innocence, they believe she knew all along and allowed him to molest. His parents are shocked. Both are devastated by their failure to protect George's young stepsister and their grandchild.

An Unsuccessful "Success Story"

Now that you've read about George's 26 years of molesting, what do you think? Is this a success story? His family says yes.

George's wife believes George when he says he's learned his lesson. He's glad he's going to jail. He deserved to be punished. It's as though jail will be his salvation. Now, it's over. He will never touch a little girl again. In her mind, this severe (and deserved) punishment of a flawed man with a good core is all that is needed.

His minister believes George too. He's prayed with him in his jail cell.

The judge hates these cases. Thank goodness the law is clear. He listens to the parade of character witnesses. George is a stellar employee, a person who does good work with the adults in his community, full of remorse, a changed man. The sentence is long - 20 years, to serve seven.

In George's case, in that old-era way of doing things, we used every old strategy to stop him.

George was a religious man. He knew that molesting a child was a sin. After his arrest, George's wife found a Bible in his car's glove compartment. Sometimes, when he was fighting his strong desire to sexually touch a child, he would recite certain passages and he would use the power of his deep religious convictions to stop that desire. Religion - in George's case - saved a few little girls from being molested. Still, he molested 23 little girls.

George was arrested and sent to jail. This strategy may have prevented more little girls from becoming victims; it did protect his nieces from George molesting them again. Still, he molested 23 little girls.

Many of the people around George believe that George's case is a success. After all, George's molesting has been stopped. He's been arrested; he's been put in jail. Many of the little girls have gone into therapy. So we have punished the child molester, we've treated the victims.

At the core, sending molesters to jail as a solution will always fail our children. Why? Because in order for a molester to be jailed, the criminal justice strategy requires that our children be sexually abused. Without a victim, it can't make a move.

It's the same with treating the victims. As a strategy, it's ineffective until after our children are sexually abused.

What we find horrifying in George's case is the waiting. All the adult protectors of those 23 little girls had to wait, powerless. First, they waited while 23 little girls were sexually abused. Then they waited for a little girl to tell an adult. But that wasn't the end of the waiting. They also had to wait for one of the 23 little girls to tell an adult who was willing to report the case. While they waited, they allowed George to go on molesting little girls for 26 years.

George's family did the best they could, given their options in the old era. Today there is no reason why George's story should be repeated.

Why? Because we have new information all of us can use to stop people like George before he molests 23 little girls.

New Information - A Typical Child Molester

When George's neighbors heard of the first accusation, they took his side. They didn't know who this 10-year-old girl from another city was, but they knew George. Some of them knew his parents.

When he admitted that he had molested so many little girls, their shock reverberated in their stories: "He was the last person you would imagine." "A very unusual case." "I've known this guy since grade school, it's unbelievable."

Everyone who knows George is sure of one thing: George is nothing like a typical child molester.

After all, he comes from a good home. His wife comes from a good home. George and his wife, their two children, and both sets of grandparents live near each other and go to the same church. He was baptized in the church and still attends regularly. He pays close attention to the rules. He pays all his bills a week before the due date. He has a college fund for his two sons. He rotates his tires. He drives within the speed limit.

George's wife and his neighbors believe that it's impossible - or extremely unusual - for an ordinary man in an ordinary family, a hard working responsible, husband and father of two, a man with high moral standards to be a child molester. They mistakenly believe that his family life, his acts of responsibility, his education, his moral values all protect George from becoming a child molester. In fact, they believe that those same things protect his family - and their families' children - from any connection with child molestation.

Is this an unusual case? If you lived in George's community what facts could you tell? You could repeat this fact: George's case is not in the least unusual. George is the typical child molester. He's married, educated, working, and religious.

Most people will tell you that this couldn't be right.

It is.

Researchers asked the 4,000 admitted child molesters in the Abel and Harlow Child Molestation Prevention Study to answer questions about their lives. These abusers were men aged 18 to 80.

How does George compare? George is typical.

First of all, he's married, just like 77 percent of the more than 4000 child sexual abusers in the Child Molestation Prevention Study. George is religious, like 93 percent of the abusers. He's educated. More than 46 percent had some college education and another 30 percent were high school graduates. Like 65 percent of the admitted abusers, George was working. Numerous studies of adult victims have sought to link child molestation victims to lower social class and lower family income. All have failed. Child victims and their abusers exist equally in families of all income levels and classes. And, now from the study, we know that child molesters are as equally married, educated, employed, and religious as any other Americans.