Wednesday, December 29, 2010

"The {FRUM} Pedophile's Guide to Love and Pleasure: a Child-lover's Code of Conduct"

FIND OUT WHY RABBIS AND ORTHODOX LEADERS ARE RAVING ABOUT THIS GUIDE

Bond set in Fla. for author of pedophile guide
Phillip Ray Greaves II.
BARTOW, Fla. -- A judge set bail at $15,000 Wednesday for a Colorado man who wrote a how-to guide for pedophiles.
Phillip Greaves of Pueblo is charged with violating the state's obscenity law, a third-degree felony that could land him in prison for five years.
The 47-year-old was arrested Monday in Colorado, but Polk County Sheriff Grady Judd claims jurisdiction in the case because Greaves sold and mailed a copy of his book to undercover deputies in Florida who had requested a copy.
Court-appointed public defender Francis Solorzano, assigned because Greaves could not afford an attorney, first asked Judge John Kirkland to drop the case.
"Any finding of probable cause would tend to have a chilling effect on free speech," Solorzano said. "What we're dealing here is mere words. There are no images in the book."
But Kirkland said the judge who signed the arrest warrant had already found probable cause and he could not override that decision.
The self-published book - "The Pedophile's Guide to Love and Pleasure: a Child-lover's Code of Conduct" - caused a flap when it showed up on Amazon in November. It was later removed from the site.
Greaves, who has no criminal record, writes in the book that pedophiles are misunderstood, as the word literally means to love a child. He adds it is only a crime to act on sexual impulses toward children, and offers advice that purportedly allows pedophiles to abide by the law.
Judd said he was incensed when he heard about the book and that no one had arrested Greaves for selling it. The book, Judd said, included first-person descriptions of sexual encounters, purportedly written from a child's point of view.
During the hearing Wednesday, Greaves' attorney asked Kirkland to reduce or eliminate the $15,000 bond.
"It is 15 times the standard bond schedule for a third-degree felony," Solorzano said. "That should be considered excessive."
But prosecutor Brad Copley said the state believes the $15,000 bond "is on the low side."
Kirkland decided to keep the bond at $15,000. If Greaves does post it, he must stay in the state of Florida, not use a computer and not have contact with anyone under 18.
Solorzano said it is unlikely Greaves will be able to raise the bail money. He is being held at the Polk County Jail and told local media on Tuesday that he "only has sex with grown-ups" and that writing and selling his book falls under his constitutional right to free speech.
He is charged under Florida's obscenity law, which prohibits the "distribution of obscene material depicting minors engaged in conduct harmful to minors."
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Pope, Gedolim reflect on the 70's




Pope Benedict used his annual speech to Rome's cardinals and bishops on Monday (Dec. 20) to ask them to reflect on the church's responsibility in the child sex abuse scandals.
Benedict qualified his mea culpa by stating that the scandal (in which priests who sexually abused children were often ignored or protected by the Catholic Church) was partly justified by the broader social context. Benedict said that while the church accepted some responsibility, he could not be silent about ''the context of these times.... There is a market in child pornography that seems in some way to be considered more and more normal by society." [History of Pornography No More Prudent Than Present]
Benedict claimed that as recently as the 1970s, "pedophilia was theorized as something fully in conformity with man and even with children." In this climate, the Catholic Church's actions were merely reflecting the moral relativism of the times: "It was maintained — even within the realm of Catholic theology — that there is no such thing as evil in itself or good in itself," Benedict said. That is, church leaders weren't sure if child sexual abuse was wrong, since secular society seemed to accept it.
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Theodore A. Sypnier, a 101-year-old pedophile, went to prison last spring saying he would rather die than spend another day behind bars.
He died early Tuesday, and his daughter says the family is relieved.
"The world is that much safer because he is not here," said Martha Juchnowski, his daughter and one of his victims. "I think I can speak for my family: There is a sense of relief. This has been a horrible thing that has been hanging over our heads all our lives."
Sypnier, the oldest inmate imprisoned by the state, died of natural causes at 12:23 a.m. Tuesday in a prison medical unit, according to Linda M. Foglia, spokeswoman for the Department of Correctional Services.
Before he was sent back to prison in April on a parole violation, Sypnier, weeping, told The Buffalo News, "I don't want to go back. I'd rather die."
As word spread of his death, no tears were being shed for the man who authorities said sexually attacked children for decades in Buffalo and later in the Town of Tonawanda.
"I hope this brings a little bit of comfort to his family and those he hurt so deeply. You can't go back and change things," said the Rev. Terry J. King, whose organization, Saving Grace Ministries, assists ex-convicts.
Sypnier had received temporary shelter in King's East Side halfway house after he was released on parole in the fall of 2009.
"We did not want him to hurt again or victimize anyone. Certainly he had hurt enough people through his lifetime," King said. "It is sad all the way around."
Last Wednesday, Sypnier's health began to fail, and he was transferred from Groveland Correctional Facility in Livingston County to the Coxsackie Correctional Facility's regional medical unit in Greene County, south of Albany.
A prison chaplain spoke with Sypnier in his final days, but Juchnowski said she was not aware that he had expressed any remorse.
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Male Survivor




10 Daily Affirmations for Male Survivors
Howard Fradkin, Ph.D., LICDC, Co-Chairperson, MaleSurvivor Weekends of Recovery
  1. Recovery is absolutely possible and achievable for me.
  2. I will practice being disloyal to dysfunction and loyal to functionality.
  3. I give myself permission to connect to loving, affirmative, strong, sensitive, accepting men and women in my community.
  4. I release and forgive myself for any responsibility I have accepted in the past for my abuse.
  5. The abuser (s) from the past chose to hurt me; I will stop repeating the lie that it just happened to me.
  6. Offering myself daily compassion is necessary for my healing and growth.
  7. I commit to connecting to the boy inside me today so we can play, laugh and experience joy together, even if just for a minute or two.
  8. I believe deep inside me I possess the ability to face the truth of my abuse and to learn to use new tools for healing.
  9. I have the right and the ability to speak the truth of my abuse and deserve to be heard, understood, believed and supported.
  10. Feeling is healing; as I heal, I develop the ability to experience a wider range of emotions to enhance my health and connections to others.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Child Sexual Predator "Rabbi" Yehuda Kolko Arrested Again

Brooklyn rabbi busted for violating order of protection against boy, 12

Monday, November 22nd 2010, 4:00 AM
Rabbi Yehuda Kolko was charged with sexual abuse in 2006.
Egan-Chin/News
Rabbi Yehuda Kolko was charged with sexual abuse in 2006.
A Brooklyn rabbi was arrested for violating an order of protection against a 12-year-old boy he is accused of sexually molesting, police said.
Rabbi Yehuda Kolko was charged with sexual abuse in 2006, accused of molesting students at Yeshiva Torah Temimah in Brooklyn, where he was a teacher. He pleaded guilty to child endangerment.
He was accused of violating an order of protection on Nov. 12 by stopping and glared at one of the victim after they crossed paths on the street.
The boy is set to testify in a civil suit against the school in March, a family advocate said.
"The experience of again being threatened and intimidated by Kolko these past weeks retraumatized him," the boy's father said in a statement to the Daily News. "He can't sleep. He's afraid to go outside."
The father filed a complaint with cops, who arrested Kolko Saturday.
Brooklyn Criminal Court Judge Evelyn Laporte warned Kolko to stay away from his accusers at his arraignment on Sunday night. Kolko was released on his own recognizance.
Defense lawyer Jeffrey Schwartz scoffed at the new charges.
"These days they arrest people if you look at them the wrong way. It's not a crime," said Schwartz, accusing the victims of trying to set up Kolko.


Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/news/ny_crime/2010/11/22/2010-11-22_bust_perv_rabbi_for_glare_at_victim.html#ixzz16GgNhuCf
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The Grooming Process of a Child Sexual Predator.

by Megan Bayliss | More from this Blogger
Grooming is a process of desensitization that predators use on children to prepare and trick them into accepting sexual abuse. Once the predator has gained the child's trust and confidence, they use everyday behaviours, like telling an inappropriate joke, a touch on the upper arm that lingers a little too long or a kiss on the lips to test whether your child is likely to tell on them. If the perpetrator is satisfied that your child won't tell, the predator moves onto other forms of bad touching. If the child still doesn't tell, then the abuse continues along the continuum of abuse from non contact, to contact and often ending with penetration and sometimes even homicide.
Just as we groom ourselves before going out to make us look presentable, predators often groom themselves as wonderful, caring people. They may involve themselves in your family's life and often do great things in the community. This is a trick. This is their game. This is their way of being open about being sneaky and of gaining more access to your child. They often set themselves up to be high profile in a community and they spend a lot of energy in ensuring their innocence. They can sometimes be the person that we would first approach to baby-sit while we go to dinner. They are so good with the kids, so loving and protective, so eager to assist.
Grooming can take many months, and includes grooming adults around the child. Including you. The child's support networks are groomed to disbelieve any thing their child may say about bad touches. The predator may try to win your confidence and support by having some quick conversations with you about a lie the child told or they may even suggest that there's something unbalanced about your child. They do it so caringly and openly portray their concern and willingness to support you. The quick comments may well be true. The child may have lied or may even be acting out of character. But, just remember that if a child lies once it doesn't doom them to an eternal cycle of lying. If ever your child says they've been abused, always believe them, even if you think it's impossible. Remember, your thoughts of impossibility may be because you've been groomed.
Developed world research suggests that eighty-five percent of child sexual abuse is perpetrated by somebody well known to the child: somebody that has access to your child on an ongoing basis. This may suggest that the grooming has become so entrenched into our daily life that we fail to recognize it as grooming. Predators need access to children and the family home is a great place to find kids.
Sometimes we are married to the perpetrators and do not know it because they have groomed us so well. Yes, even some parents sexually abuse their own children. Females too, sexually abuse. Mostly though, parents and grandparents love their children and want to protect them. If you know a family member, or anyone else, who may be abusing children you need to get them some help. The only way to get help is to tell someone in a position to act upon and stop the abuse: the police or child welfare authority in your state. You cannot assist, or change perpetrators, because you would do so at the risk of your child. Failure to protect children is as bad as abusing the child yourself. Darkness to Light suggests that an average serial perpetrator may abuse 400 children in a lifetime. By not protecting one child, you are also failing to protect other children. Please report.
In this age of terrorism, we are quick to act on any suspicious activity. We are trying to prevent further acts of terror by recognizing the warning signs and intervening before something happens. Child sexual abusers are domestic terrorists and their acts affect our children for many years to come. Prevent the infiltration of domestic terrorism by recognizing the grooming process and stopping it now.
In tomorrow's blog we'll look at why children don't always tell you they've been abused. Believe it or not, the silence can also be a part of the grooming process. In the meantime, here's some related Families.com articles to ponder: Our children in danger from sexual molestors. Coping with sexual assault. Coping with sexual assault 2. Teaching children about child molesters. The epidemic of online child sexual crimes.

Friday, October 29, 2010

90% of all children sexually assaulted by someone they know and trust



By Samuel Newhouse
Brooklyn Daily Eagle JAY STREET — An Orthodox Jewish child molester who was sentenced to a maximum of 30 years earlier this year appeared in Brooklyn Supreme Court Wednesday for a pretrial hearing in yet another case of alleged sexual abuse of a minor.
Baruch Lebovits, 59, of Borough Park, who was convicted of sexually molesting a teenager in his community, appeared before Kings County Supreme Court Justice Patricia Di Mango, the same Brooklyn judge who sentenced him in April to 10 2/3 to 32 years in prison.
Justice Di Mango gave Lebovits the maximum sentence for each of eight counts of abusing a 16-year-old Borough Park resident, whom Lebovits lured on several occasions in 2004 and 2005 to his silver Toyota for “driving lessons” before performing oral sex on the victim, who was a friend of Lebovits’ son.
Now Lebovits has at least one more active sexual abuse case and could face even more indictments, as several alleged victims came forward after Lebovits was sentenced. Sources in law enforcement have called the crimes Lebovits has been charged with “the tip of the iceberg.”
One alleged victim said Lebovits fondled him in a mikvah or ritual bath while the victim was a teen, but made the claim after being arrested himself for allegedly fondling a 12-year-old in a mikvah, according to the Daily News.
Despite these allegations, Lebovits, a cantor (traditional Jewish singer) and a local teacher, still has some supporters in the community. But the father of the victim whose testimony led to Lebovits’ April sentence has called Lebovits a “grand-molester.”

Read more: http://www.brooklyneagle.com/categories/category.php?category_id=4&id=38583

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http://www.csasurvivor.net/?page_id=222

JAMAICA:PUBLIC OUTRAGE, EXPOSE MOLESTERS NOW!

Mary Clarke.jpg
MARY CLARKE, Children’s Advocate, on Wednesday appealed to members of the public not to shield child abusers. She made the appeal while addressing the launch of the child abuse prevention campaign at the Bustamante Children’s Hospital. She said her office was concerned that children who are to appear before the courts as victims of rape and carnal abuse often miss court dates.
“When the summons are to be served for them to come to court, they cannot be found. Mother’s don’t know, guardians don’t know, community members don’t know, and after the date of the case, the child reappears,” she said.
“I am calling on you today to be responsible citizens - that is being very irresponsible. You are protecting abusers, you are helping no one.”
SIMILAR APPEAL
Howard Hamilton.jpg
Public Defender, Howard Hamilton, also made a similar appeal. He said men who have sex with one-month-old babies and young children because they believe that they can be cured from a sexually transferred disease should cease this atrocity. “This can no longer continue, men cannot be allowed to go to a four-month-old infant, so let this be a turning point in Jamaica,” he said.
Mrs. Clarke said since the beginning of the year, there were 80 cases of sexual and physical abuse cases reported at the Bustamante Children’s Hospital. Of this number, 14 could not be traced because wrong addresses were given.
“Parents, guardians, caregivers, you have a responsibility for your children. You must give the correct addresses and phone numbers. Why are you concealing the children who need the psycho-social support to help them get over the hurt that they have felt, why? Why are you hiding the abusers?” she asked.
She said of the 14, five were assaulted and nine were physically injured. She said during last year, there were 8,275 victims of major crimes. Of this number, 24 per cent were children under 14 years old.
Rose Robinson-Hall, chairman and coordinator of the Child Abuse Mitigation Project at the Bustamante Children’s Hospital, told The Gleaner that the child abuse campaign would involve in-house training of staff to recognise behaviours that are abusive and to be able to respond appropriately to these cases. 

AWARENESS IS YOUR BEST DEFENSE

  • dog_head.jpg
BECOME A WATCHDOG 
“AWARENESS IF YOUR BEST DEFENSE” 
OVER HALF A MILLION SEXUAL PREDATORS LIVING IN COMMUNITIES ACROSS THE UNITED STATES
SEXUAL ABUSE BEFORE 18TH BIRTHDAY IS A REALITY FOR GIRLS AND BOYS
  • 1 in 5 girls will be sexually assaulted before 18
  • 1 in 6 boys will be sexually assaulted before 18
  • 1 in 5 children propositioned on the Internet
  • 90% of all children sexually assaulted by someone they know and trust

According to a National Institute of Justice study done in 1996, child sexual abuse costs America $23 billion.
  • Victims of child sexual abuse generally spend more on psychiatric care services throughout their lives
  • More is spent on special educational services.
  • The loss in potential and productivity, and these expenses would not be necessary if not for sexual abuse and its financial drain to each and everyone of us
A FRIEND OF THE FAMILY MAY BE NO FRIEND AT ALL
  • 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys will be sexually abused or sexually assaulted by their 18th birthday
  • The perpertrators aren’t “dirty old men hiding in the bushes” but family members
For More Information http://www.familywatchdog.us

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TWENTY-FOUR QUESTIONS ABOUT PROFESSIONAL PRACTICE IN THE AREA OF CHILD ABUSE
  1. What constitutes child abuse and neglect?
  2. Who has to report child abuse and neglect?
  3. If I report, am I breaking confidentiality?
  4. Under what circumstances do I have a duty to report child abuse?
  5. How do I report? and What information am I required to disclose in a child abuse report?
  6. Will I get in trouble if I do not report child abuse as required under laws of my state?
  7. Will I get in trouble if I do report? and Can I be sued by the person I report?
  8. Do I have to report every instance of child abuse?
  9. Do I have to report if the suspected abuser is in treatment or if I believe the reporting would do more harm than good?
  10. What will be the response to my report?
  11. Are there issues I should consider for disclosure?
  12. How shall I handle a child’s disclosure of abuse by a parent?
  13. How shall I handle a child’s disclosure of abuse by a non-family member?
  14. What are some possible effects for the child, the family, and treatment when a disclosure or report are made?
  15. What are possible beneficial effects of reporting for the child and family?
  16. What are some of the possible personal issues I should be aware of in handling disclosure and reporting?
  17. What are the characteristics and symptoms of a child who has been abused?
  18. How do I recognize and verify what abuse had occurred?
  19. Are there psychological measures to assist in evaluations of victims of child abuse?
  20. What special considerations are there in the assessment of victims of child abuse?
  21. What are the emotional demands of providing intervention services to victims of child abuse?
  22. What roles can I play in supporting and providing intervention services to the victims of child abuse?
  23. How do I provide treatment to a child who has been abused?
  24. What are the therapeutic issues, reasonable goals, and special considerations when providing treatment to a child who has been abused?
From The American Psychological Association’s (APA, 1995) Committee on Professional Practice and Standards
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EXPOSE THE PERP: THE AFTERMATH

As you heal from child sexual abuse and talk more about the trauma, you will become more comfortable with what you tell others, especially family members.
The details you share of the abuse is up to you, and you can choose to share what you are confident about. Usually a survivor will share with a family member you are most comfortable with, because you will receive various responses from family.
Usually a survivor will tell a family member what took place and immediately the family member will want to know what exactly happened between you and perpertrator. Then after the family member has time to absorb the information they will want to talk more about the perpertrator.
Family members will express different emotions,and ask all sorts of questions. Believe it or not this communication will help make a better relationship between family members, because communication is taking place and that is one of the key steps to healing.
Now as a survivor you have the option to answer and not answer questions, the ones that make you uncomfortable, you need to say that you cannot answer. As a general rule, your privacy and boundaries are important here.
Each time your family asks questions about the abuse, be prepared for different reactions, be thoughtful of your family’s emotions now, because these emotions will affect you too. As these discussions take place, a survivor can reexperience thoughts about the sexual abuse that they resolved. This is normal part of what happens when telling the family what happened.
Please be prepared that not all family members will believe what you have to say about the perpertrator, you may feel angry with family for this, even sad, but it is important that you know the truth, and again ” the truth shall set you free”, and its not about changing anyone else but changing and healing yourself.. As you heal you will become better at setting boundaries, and developing healthy relationships, promoting safety and trust in your life. Family members who respect and trust you are those you keep close to you. To avoid unstable relationship there must be trust, not chaos, crisis and inconsistency, and as a survivor we want to definelty avoid this in our lives.
Here are few ideas:
Establishing Boundaries:
No one touches you without your permission and consent, and you touch no one without their persmission and consent.
Choose who you want to be sexual with, some one who is safe and you feel comfortable and who you have a reciprocity in terms of respect, love and care.
Trust is conditional; people earn trust, as well they earn yours. There are different levels of trust for different people.
Do not tolerate disrespectful behavior and speak up when it happens.
Honor your feelings and those of others
Stand up for your self and believe in you right to do so.
Give yourself permission to be who you are and to try new experiences
Affirm your life today, and acknowledge the good that exist in your life today
Take time for yourself and not allow others to intrude on your time. Say no and do not feel guilty.
Praise yourself often.
Excerpts from Healing from the Trauma of Sexual abuse by Karen Duncan.
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CONFRONTING ABUSE IN THE ORTHODOX COMMUNITY
(This article first appeared in NEFESH)
By Rabbi Yosef Blau
It is no longer possible to ignore the tragic reality that sexual, physical and emotional
abuse exists within the Orthodox community. Recent revelations about rabbis and
teachers abusing adolescents, often continuing to abuse for decades, dramatically remind
us that our existing mechanisms are failing to deal with the problem. I am not aware of
any statistics which clarify whether the numbers of offenders is substantial, but even a
small number can traumatize hundreds of victims.
The full measure of the horrendous nature of abuse is not always apparent from a
technical halakhic perspective. Two teenagers touching each other inappropriately are
guilty of the same sin as a forty-year old rabbi touching a thirteen- year old female
student. We intuitively recognize that the rabbi has used his position as an authority
figure to manipulate a vulnerable child, though she is an adult according to halakha. A
pedophile who abuses minors even if he gets their approval is halakhicly a rapist but not
if he does the same with an adolescent boy or girl.
It is even more difficult to pinpoint the sin when dealing with emotional abuse and
manipulation. While one can make similar technical arguments in other areas of halakha,
its significance in this context is its use as cover for the many who do not want to deal
with the full implications of confronting rabbinical abuse. Not wanting to see themselves
as lacking sympathy for victims, people can claim to be concerned about preserving
halkhic standards. How rare it is to have two witnesses who saw the abuse.
Even when the pattern of abuse is clear the question remains how to effectively deal with
the abuser in a way that at least limits his ability to move elsewhere and continue to abuse
new people. Schools fire abusive teachers who then move to another community and
start teaching (and abusing) in the new yeshiva. Going public is seen as causing a chilul
Hashem and going to secular authorities as mesira.
Virtually all poskim agree that if there is danger to future victims then there is no
halakhic issue of mesira but practically the taboo of mesira remains. Victims are
discouraged from coming forward on other grounds as well. It will hurt potential
shidduchim, not only for the victim but for members of his family as well. Compassion
is expressed for the reputations of members of the abuser’s family as well. The
probability that the family members may have suffered abuse themselves and suffer from
being in ongoing contact with the abuser, is not understood.
Taking the accusation to a Beis Din unfortunately is rarely effective. Few rabbis have
any training in recognizing abuse and the rabbinical courts have no investigative arm.
Some abusers are charismatic leaders and have followers who will say whatever they ask
them to say. Perjury to a Beis Din is not punished and in many cases the witness, in
support of his mentor, has no difficulty with distorting what occurred. The cultic element
in the guru’s leadership is hard for us to acknowledge. A rabbi promoting Judaism is
seen as incapable of being a cult leader.
Newspapers, particularly Jewish newspapers are assumed to be anti-Orthodox. Speaking
to them is almost the act of a traitor. Yet at the present time the media has played a
primary role in the increased awareness of this problem and an abuser whose name that
has appeared in the media is unlikely to be hired by a new school or youth movement.
Two recent cases point to differing approaches now being used. In one story from Israel
a commission including a rabbi, a psychologist and a judge evaluated allegations and the
accused was fired from his teaching position. He hired a lawyer and is fighting for
reinstatement. The Israeli media have picked up the story. A recent article in Maariv
broadened the discussion to quote varying views about rabbis counseling married women.
The other case involved allegations that had been investigated twenty years ago and a
resulting agreement that an individual would leave Jewish education, which was not
effectively enforced. After two decades it became difficult to reconstruct what had
occurred. Supporters of the accused spoke freely to the media while victims used
pseudonyms. New allegations surfaced and a major expose appeared in the papers and a
new Beit Din was formed to decide how to deal with the accusations. While no formal
announcement has been made, their apparent decision was to send the case to a religious
court in Israel that will deal with the charges.
Despite growing awareness and concern no consensus has yet emerged. Rabbis are not
trained to recognize abuse nor given an approach to aid them in responding when they
realize that it is occurring. Principals are not equipped to respond to accusations against
teachers in their schools. Rabbinical organizations do not have rules of appropriate
conduct. Accused abusers retain memberships in these organizations without any process
to remove their names.
Our community has not been educated to recognize abuse nor to appreciate the ongoing
trauma of victims. Headlines in newspapers are not effective educational tools. Often
the response is to express anger at the paper and then ignore the abuse. Until the
mentality of the community changes little progress will be made.
Even if a method will be developed to get rabbinical approval for victims to go to the
police much of the problem will remain. Not every manifestation of abuse involves
criminal behavior. “Rabbis” who seduce women as part of outreach or marital therapy
are not guilty of a punishable offence. Proper utilization of secular authorities is a
necessary step but clearly not a total solution.
In Chicago, after there were a number of serious incidents, a special Beit Din, whose
members are respected across the Orthodox spectrum, was established to deal with
accusations of abuse. Similar rabbinical courts in other major cities, whose judges would
be trained to recognize abuse and would have appropriate mental health professionals as
consultants, should be introduced. Creating special rabbinical courts is a powerful
statement that a serious problem needs to be addressed.
Nefesh professionals have a critical role to play in educating the Orthodox community,
in treating and supporting victims and in serving as consultants for schools and
organizations. Only people who are trained can lead a systematic campaign explaining
the nature of abuse and the need to confront it openly. Stigma has to be removed from
victims. Invariably when the identity of an abuser is revealed the response of far too
many is “We have known that for years.” Enabling abusers to continue, covering their
crimes to protect the image of the community, contribute to innocents being traumatized.
Judith Herman in her book on trauma points out that both the abuser and the victims turn
to others for support. The victim needs action while the abuser only asks for our silence.
It is time to stop the silence. The true chilul Hashem is that we allow victims to continue
to suffer in order to preserve our community’s image. 

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Hashem Yirachem Aleinu!

















http://www.juf.org/news/local.aspx?id=63724#

Address by Rachel Zimmerman, coordinator of Project Shield at the Jewish Child and Family Services and recipient of the 2010 Samuel A. Goldsmith Award, at the 110th Annual Meeting of the Jewish Federation of Metropolitan Chicago Sept. 15, 2010.
Thank you- It is a great honor to be receiving this award- but really, I can’t accept it on my own for what is truly being honored today is the work of many.
Let me just take a moment to say congratulations to David, Lisa, Jason and Rabbi Kurtz- I am honored to be sharing the morning with you.
I also want to thank G-d first and foremost for giving me the strength to reach this point.
Last October- I did something really brave and somewhat crazy- I ran my first marathon.
Three years ago, when I started running, I couldn’t run a mile.
But I started jogging for a couple of minutes at a time before collapsing breatheless.
Then I celebrated being able to run for 30 minutes straight.
Suddenly I could run 5 miles and onward I went from there.
Crossing the finish line of first marathon was a life altering moment. Not just because of the cool bragging rights (though that’s nice) but because I never in my life thought I could do it. And as I spent five hours running that fateful Sunday morning I consistently received messages from every part of my body saying “stop”, I’m, tired, :you can’t do this”, “you’re not ready yet”, “This hurts”, “you’ll never make it”. And as I heard the barrage of complaints I closed my eyes and told myself over and over again “I can and I will, I can and I will, I can and I will”.
Three years ago I took on the job as the coordinator of Project Shield.
The task seemed daunting, the distance that needed to be covered seemed too great. You want me to do what? Sexual abuse of children is a hard topic to talk about. I expected doors to be slammed in my face, inquiries about training to be denied, and people to not want to believe that this is an issue happening in our very own community.
But in reality, the CDC cites that 1 in 4 women will be sexually abused before the age of 18 and 1 in 6 men. I have yet to do a training or a presentation where someone hasn’t come up to me afterwards or contacted me a couple of days later to tell me that they were abused, or a loved one was abused. The survivors of this silent epidemic are to be found in every country, in every culture, in every religion, and in every community.
With all of this information I took a deep breath- I closed my eyes and said “I can and I will” There was a lot of education to be done and so I took my first step forward.
And so it began. But just like with running- the gains that were being made in a short period of time were incredible. My fears started to fall by the wayside- camps said yes to having their staff trained. Parents showed up to prevention talks, and Rabbis requested meetings with me to hear more about what they could do.
But there is one main and very significant difference between running and Project Shield- Running is a one-man sport. If you fall or get hurt your race is over.
Project Shield is a team effort. Every month, every week, and every day, more and more people are joining our team. It is through the efforts of one of the most amazing teams ever put together that Shield had grown and succeeded in the astounding way that it has.
First- The Jewish Federation. Without your guidance, your funding, your unwavering support, your advice and expertise- we would not be the program that we are today.
Secondly- JCFS. What an incredible organization JCFS is. The breadth and depth of all the work we do takes my breathe away when I stop to think about it. Everyone from our wonderful executive director Howard Sitron, to our amazing Director of Community Programs, Planning, and Development- Suzanne Franklin, every clinician, every program staff, and every support staff- they have all put their hand in to help and to ask “what can we do to help you make Project Shield stronger.”
Third- the Project Shield Advisory Council. A little over two years ago we invited a group of professionals from inside and outside the Jewish community to come together to help advise our program. Together that council formed a strong voice and each member of the council has used their own strengths and programs to open doors for Shield programming. I am awed by each one of them on a constant basis.
Fourth- The leaders of the Jewish community. Every Rabbi, Every School Principal, and Every Camp Director, and Every Lay Leader that I have contacted have each been instrumental in taking the messages of Project Shield and making them a reality within each organization that they serve. I am honored to live and work in a community that has the leaders that it has.
Fifth- My incredible supervisors. The one’s that got me into this embaressing speech in the first place by nominating me. Amy Rubin and Lynn Shyman. I come to work knowing that no problem is too big to be overcome- because I have the incredible daily advice and guidance from these incredible women.  They support me and the program in every way imaginable and I truly believe that I am the luckiest employee of JCFS for having such an amazing supervisory team. I learn from you both on everything from how to be a professional, how to write a proper English sentence, how to build community collaborations, to how to handle a crisis situations. The love and admiration I have for you both is never ending. Thank you!
And lastly, but most importantly on the Project Shield team is my family. Without which I could never do what I do. So thank you to my amazing parents. Thank you to my amazing in-laws. Thank you to my four beautiful children who are so tolerant with my schedules and with all my crazy ways.  A big I love you to my beautiful and sweet daughter Devorah who is here representing all of her siblings- And thank you the most to my husband. My husband is my role model, my Rabbi, and my best friend all in one. Thank you for enabling a moment like this to happen.
So back to last October when I crossed that marathon finish line- oh and by the way- just to answer my most frequently asked question- Yes I do run in a skirt- and nah- it’s not hard at all- but I digress- anyway- so when I crossed the line, besides for being exhausted- I thought to myself- I need to do this again. There are more races to be run and more miles to be logged. This race is just the beginning…….
And today as I stand here I realize- that we the Project Shield team have come a long way, but we have a lot more to do and more distance to cover. So to end- I invite you all- every person in this room- to take the message of project shield, and help us to create safer Jewish homes by starting conversations in your own lives, with your own family members, and with organizations that you’re involved with. Learn about the signs of symptoms of child sexual abuse, urge parents to learn how to talk to their children about prevention- because Education is power and the key to prevention.
And if we – the Project Shield team of today’s annual meeting – all step up to day “we can and we will, we can and we will” imagine where we’ll all be in three more years from now.
Thank you!

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Rabbinic Sewage Suffocating Holy Torah

Guilty or Innocent?

"Hazmana" Belsky leading the pack

Lakewood Orthodox Jewish
leaders want abuse
accusations addressed

As rift widens, community insists problems
should be brought to rabbis

By ZACH PATBERG • STAFF WRITER • August 25,
2010

One man's criminal accusation that a teacher
molested his young son has widened the rift in the

Orthodox Jewish
community over where religious
rights stop and the justice system begins.

Some inside the tight-knit enclave praised the
child's father for bypassing religious protocols last
year and reporting the alleged attack first to Ocean
County prosecutors. Others believe he committed a
sin because he failed to get permission from a
rabbinic court before pressing charges against a
fellow Jew.


"The first step is to go to rabbis,'' said Rabbi Shmuel
Meir Katz, a senior Dayan, or decider of Jewish law.
He teaches at
Beth Medrash Govoha, a yeshiva in
Lakewood that is one of the foremost Jewish
universities in the world. "We have our own system.
We have our own laws, and as long as the Bais Din
(rabbinical tribunal) feels competent on taking care
of something themselves, that's our surest recourse
in our circles.''
 

At the center of the controversy are the criminal
charges against Yosef Kolko, 36, a former camp
counselor and local yeshiva teacher. At his
arraignment Tuesday, Kolko pleaded not guilty to
charges of aggravated sexual assault and child
endangerment. The child was between 11 and 12
years old when the more than yearlong alleged
abuse began in Lakewood, according to the
indictment. The Asbury Park Press is withholding
the father's name to protect the child's identity.

The case is a stark example of what Ocean County
Prosecutor Marlene Lynch Ford described as a "wall
of silence'' in the community that has made
investigating crimes difficult.
 

The decision of the child's father to go immediately
to authorities last year has sparked reprisals,
according to prosecutors and witnesses. 

Attempts were made to pressure the father to drop the
charges. Fliers about him were circulated. In June, a
Lakewood resident was arrested and charged with

witness-tampering
.
 

Eight months ago, religious leaders and county law
enforcement authorities pledged to work together to
better prosecute crimes within the Orthodox
community. Since then, more sex crimes in
Lakewood have been reported, but there is no
information if those cases came from inside or
outside the Orthodox community.

But the Kolko case has exposed a strong
undercurrent of resistance to outside involvement.  

A recent flier criticizing the father included a decree
signed by prominent rabbis that discouraged
cooperation with secular courts.
On June 30, at a charity fundraiser in Lakewood, a
flier was circulated with a letter
titled "How (the child's father) Makes a Mockery of
the Torah.'' It described the father's choice to go to
prosecutors as a "terrible deed,'' according to a t
ranslation from Hebrew. It also threatened to
publicize the names of his supporters if they don't
""repent.''

"We hope that after tonight further letters will not be
necessary,'' it stated. "However, let the perpetrators
of this (shameful thing) know that ... we will not stop
(until this horrible shame is removed from us).''

The letter includes the name of a Bronx rabbi, Abba
Hershkowitz, and his phone number. It is otherwise
unsigned. It could not be verified that Hershkowitz
approved the letter.

Attached to the same flier was a proclamation
signed by nine Lakewood rabbis that instructs
people to bring allegations to a Bais Din rabbinical
tribunal before alerting government authorities.


At this point, there is no evidence that the signers
of the proclamation meant to have their names
distributed with the letter.

The proclamation reads in part: "And if, in fact, he
has transgressed and has gone so far as to bring
the matter to the secular (nonreligious) courts, he
is, perforce, obligated to do everything possible in
order to remove any scintilla of accusation against
the other party from the secular courts,'' it states,
according to a translation by
Rina Ne'eman Hebrew
Language Services
in New Brunswick paid for by the
Press. "And it need not be stated that it is forbidden
(for him) to continue to cooperate with them (secular
courts) and to assist them in their efforts to pursue
a Jew.''

The proclamation, dated in the spring of 2010, is
signed by some of Lakewood's leading authorities
on Jewish law, including heads of yeshivas and
synagogues, Bais Din judges and two rabbis from
the Beth Medrash Govoha yeshiva.

Three rabbis confirmed they signed the
proclamation but declined to say more. They were
Avrohom Spitzer, a Dayan; Yosef Zimbal, a rabbi at
Westgate Congregation; and Simcha Bunim Cohen, a
rabbi at Congregation Ateres Yeshaya. Another,
Rabbi Shmuel Katz, said he did not remember the 
exact contents of the decree but nonetheless
repeated its philosophy.

"From the time we open our eyes in the morning,
our religion tells us how to take care of this,'' he
said.

Katz compared the religious and legal courts to the
two houses of Congress. Batei Din, he said, offers a
platform for cooler heads to prevail when dealing
with emotional issues that may otherwise spark rash
accusations and damage reputations.

While he put both systems on equal footing, Katz
did say accusers should go to rabbis before the
police. He added that if a rabbi were unsure of the
answer or direction to proceed, he would be
obligated to consult professionals.

When asked if that included going to law
enforcement, Katz didn't specify.


"If somebody's engaging in devious activities, he
(the consulted rabbi) should speak to an expert in
those things,'' he said. "And if he doesn't know, he
says he doesn't know.''

Such an internal system has previously raised
concerns among child advocates and some
Orthodox families who fear it can act as a
gatekeeper in sex-abuse cases. Its lack of
investigative skills and real judicial authority, they
say, leave wide cracks through which pedophiles
can, and have, slipped.

Ford, the Ocean County prosecutor, said she does
not condone going to a rabbi first about a crime, as
third-party delays can contaminate evidence and
hinder investigations.

But, she said, sex crimes, more so than most
offenses, often are reported to a confidant before
law enforcement because of their sensitive nature.
Ford said she recognizes this "reality'' as her office
tries to "penetrate a wall of silence that has
admittedly existed in the Orthodox community for
many years.''

However, when people are ordered to first seek
rabbinic permission, she said, "that clearly conflicts
with the law.''

"And someone would not be insulated from liability
or even prosecution if they fail to report to
authorities reasonable suspicions,'' she said.
  
  
In the Kolko case, another man, Shaul Luban of
Lakewood, was charged with
witness-tampering. Prosecutors say he sent text
messages that urged people to pressure the child's
father to drop the charges.

The letter with Hershkowitz's name is in that same
vein and is being investigated, said Assistant
Prosecutor Lara Pierro, who is handling the Kolko
case.

"When we receive word that there's pressure on the
family, we pursue it,'' she said.

Messages seeking comment and left with
Hershkowitz at the number listed on the letter and at
the college in Riverdale, N.Y., where he works, were
not returned.
 

However, a relative, Brooklyn Rabbi Yisroel Belsky,
supported the position stated in the letter, saying
"such behavior (as that of the victim's father)
wouldn't be tolerated'' elsewhere. "When your child
tells you something, you don't go straight to a 
prosecutor, you go to a Bais Din and let them
examine the (evidence).''

Belsky, a rabbi at Yeshiva Torah Vodaas in the
Flatbush section of Brooklyn and a member of the
Orthodox Union, a national Jewish lobby, said he
has not seen the flier but claims "there's no evidence
at all'' against Kolko.

Not all rabbinic leaders agree. Rabbi Dovid Cohen,
an authority on Jewish law in Brooklyn, said he
received a call not long ago. It was from a
representative of the Orthodox community who
asked if the Kolko allegation should be taken to
prosecutors.

"Not only do I permit it, it is an obligation,'' he said
he replied.

"There are others who disagree,'' Cohen said
recently. "Those people aren't for
molesters; they simply feel that there's a chance a
person will be slandered. ... They feel it's not ethical
to go to authorities until it's first verified by a Bais
Din. That's where we differ.''

Cohen said he heard about the fliers in Lakewood
after a social worker called and told him the father
was "getting a lot of pressure.'' The father could not
be reached for comment.

Rabbi Weisberg of the Vaad said he believes those
who signed the proclamation were expressing
themselves "as individuals and not as some
organized body.''


click here for full article
 

Monday, July 26, 2010

One in four children being victimized? That's about seven children in every classroom. That's a significant proportion of the population.


http://www.cliffviewpilot.com/editorials/op-ed/1501-orthodox-challenged-by-child-abuse-reports-against-rabbis

Orthodox face 'double whammy' in reporting child sex abuse
Friday, 23 July 2010 19:17 Asher Lipner
OPINION: An Orthodox couple from Lakewood are very special and heroic people. When they found out that their son was molested by a rabbi, they confronted the rabbi and got him to admit it.


But when the rabbi became defiant and would not go to therapy or agree to leave the synagogue, they went to the police and had him arrested.

The mother has said that more than any act of communal concern or heroism, she did this as a simple Jewish mother for her son. She knew that if the rabbi was allowed to get away with it and nothing to happen to him, her son would forever feel abandoned and unprotected at his time of need.

The family is now suffering the "double trauma" of most victims in our community. One, their son has symptoms of PTSD. He was a very, very religious boy. His father is a Torah scholar and a majority member in the town. A Posek halacha

But the family as a whole is paying a double price. For going to the police to protect their child, something that in other communities is considered normal parenting, they are being attacked as "anti-Torah," by evil people. I would like to call them ignorant people.

In Lakewood, most people have spent years learning Torah. And even if you want to say that they don't understand the "long term ramifications" of sexual abuse (do they think it is GOOD for the kids?), they certainly know it is not something that they would want to happen to theirs. And Hillel said that the whole Torah while standing on one foot can be summarized as "Don't do to others what you don't want them to do to you."

(one who issues rulings within the community). And he was not supposed to be exposed to sexual situations and certainly not the sexual act before marriage. His innocence was robbed. His spirtuality is being challenged. His sense of security shaken.

lakewood
SIDEBAR: The battle over sex abuse reporting in the Orthodox community is exploding worldwide, and one of the hubs is in New Jersey. State law requires anyone with reasonable suspicion to alert authorities. But rabbinical authority has ruled in Orthodox communities for thousands of years, mainly due to splits with secular law over civil issues (unlike the Catholic Church scandals). Victims have been threatened, ostracized and driven out. Yet, in the wake of the latest incident, rabbinical and secular authorities in Lakewood say they are trying to "bridge the gap."
It would be such a big Mitzvah (good deed) for each and every one of us to write a letter to the family thanking them for the heroic service they have done for all of us, and for the example they set of good Jewish parenting that we should all strive for.

I will not tell you what to write, because I know each of you can say the right thing if you look into your hearts. Thank you, and we should all be eager to see this plague stamped out from our community once and for all.

Emails can be sent either to CLIFFVIEWPILOT.COM@gmail.com This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it or to lipnera@gmail.com This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .


lipner
Rabbi Dr. Asher Lipner, Ph.D., an ordained Orthodox Rabbi, is Vice-President of the Jewish Board of Advocates for Children. The opinions expressed in this article are his and do not necessarily reflect the position of any organization.




EDITOR'S NOTE: Some Jewish expressions in the rabbi's piece have been changed to more common vernacular. The parents' names have been removed to protect the child's identity.

ALSO SEE:

Sex abuse demands greater defense of children

Orthodox hope guilty plea in sex case changes approach to offenders


Passaic predator case marks change in Orthodox reaction
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


~ Abuse changes your life...Fight Back and change the life of your abusers by Breaking Your Silence on Abuse! ~


~ Child abuse casts a shadow the length of a lifetime. ~


~ Everyone is an abused child, if you think about what governments do. ~


~ Child abuse does not go away, but 90 percent of child abuse is preventable ~


~ Child abuse and neglect offend the basic values of our state. We have a responsibility to provide safe settings for at-risk children and facilitate permanent placement for children who cannot return home. ~


~ The consequences of your denial will be with you for a lifetime and will be passed down to the next generations. Break your Silence on Abuse! ~


~ The only reason why child abuse is alive today, is because we as adults fail our children when we fail to listen to them. Listen to a child today! ~


~ I believe the best service to the child is the service closest to the child, and children who are victims of neglect, abuse, or abandonment must not also be victims of bureaucracy. They deserve our devoted attention, not our divided attention. ~


~ One in four children being victimized? That's about seven children in every classroom. That's a significant proportion of the population. ~
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A Partial Biography of Rabbi Yehuda Kolko & Rabbi Lipa Margulies

[This summary was written by an anonymous ultra-Orthodox insider and published as part of an open letter during the first week of December, 2006. The events dated after July, 2006 have been added by this website's adminstrator.]
· 1967 – While working as Dormitory Counselor at Yeshivas Mir, Rabbi Yehuda Kolko calls a student (name withheld) out of his dormitory room and begins discussing matters of a sexual nature with him while rubbing up against him in an aroused state. This abuse continues for the remainder of the school year and into the summer season at Camp Agudah [then owned by Agudath Israel of America]. This student is now a distinguished Manhattan attorney living happily with his partner in New York City and insists that his lifestyle choice has absolutely nothing to do with his abuse by Kolko.
· 1969 thru 1971 - Rabbi Yehuda Kolko begins abusing Dovid Framowitz in Yeshiva Torah Vodaas of Flatbush (now known as Yeshiva Torah Temimah) and Camp Agudah, the details of which abuse are now public knowledge. Mr. Framowitz, a grandfather living in Eretz Yisroel, has not gone a day since being abused without reliving the unspeakable agony he suffered at Kolko’s hands.
· 1972 - Rabbi Yehuda Kolko sexually abuses two young campers (names withheld at the request of the victims) in Camp Agudah who complain to their counselor. Their counselor reports the complaint to Rabbi Simcha Kaufman. The abuse of these two boys cease for the remainder of that summer. Rabbi Simcha Kaufman is a co-worker of Kolko in Yeshiva Torah Temimah (more on Kaufman below) and was a co-worker of Kolko in Camp Agudah until 1976 when Kolko voluntarily left Camp Agudah after he co-founded Camp Ma-Na-Vu with Rabbi Lipa Geldwirth, another co-worker of his at Yeshiva Torah Temimah.
· 1977 – Rabbi Yehuda Kolko, employed as a Rebbe in Yeshiva Torah Temimah in the morning, is employed in the afternoons by Yeshiva Karlin Stolin as Secular Studies Principal. During the course of his short tenure in Yeshiva Karlin Stolin numerous complaints are lodged by both students and parents (names withheld at the request of the victims) accusing Kolko of sexually abusing boys in the Yeshiva. Rabbi Shmuel Dishon asks Kolko to leave the employ of the Yeshiva.
· 1977 on – Eyewitness testimony and accusations of sexual abuse by Rabbi Yehuda Kolko of students at Yeshiva Torah Temimah and Camp Ma-Na-Vu reach a crescendo which culminates in several businessmen approaching Rabbi Lipa Margulies in 1984 and offering to fund a retirement package for Rabbi Yehuda Kolko provided he seeks employment away from children. Rabbi Lipa Margulies steadfastly refuses to accept the offer and suggests that those parents who disagree with his decision remove their children from his Yeshiva Torah Temimah.
· 1981 – Rabbi Yehuda Kolko sexually abuses a twelve year old student of Yeshiva Torah Temimah (name withheld at the request of the victim.) This victim publicizes the abuse and acts out, vandalizing Kolko’s home and car. Rabbi Lipa Margulies calls this victims father and warns him that if this activity does not stop his other children would be expelled from Yeshiva and the safety of his family could not be guaranteed. This victim is subsequently referred to Avrohom Mondrowitz for counseling.
· 1984 – As instructed by Rabbi Avigdor Miller, an Askan calls for a meeting which takes place at the home of Rabbi Yakov Perlow (the Novominsker) and is attended by Rabbi Avrohom Pam, Rabbi Elya Svei, Rabbi Chaim Dov Keller, Rabbi Aharon Schechter, Rabbi Moshe Scheinerman, Rabbi Shia Fishman and Rabbi Yankel Bender. At this meeting, chaired by Rabbi Perlow, the Askan discusses what is transpiring to innocent boys at the hands of Rabbi pedophiles and requests that Torah Umesorah and the Rabbonim issue a statement calling for their removal from Chinuch. Rabbi Svei informs this Askan that Torah Umesorah has consulted their attorneys who advised that for Torah Umesorah to admit knowledge of such abuse would subject Torah Umesorah, its staff, all its member schools and their staff to liability for not having reported their knowledge to the authorities earlier. Accordingly, Rabbi Elya Svei informs the Askan, neither he nor Torah Umesorah will do anything about this problem.
· 1984 thru 1985 – At directed by Rabbi Avrohom Pam an Askan approaches Rabbi Moshe Scheinerman and the two meet with Rabbi Shia (Joshua) Fishman in the office of Torah Umesorah. Both Scheinerman and Fishman neglect to inform this Askan that Fishman had been instructed by Torah Umesorah’s lawyer to do nothing about this issue. Rabbi Fishman requests the names of Kolko’s victims and promises absolute confidentiality. Names are provided to Rabbi Fishman who begins his own investigation of the allegations. He meets with and speaks with several victims who pour their hearts out to him after he guarantees them confidentiality. Rabbi Shia Fishman promptly discloses all he has learned to Rabbi Lipa Margulies who in turn publicly disparages and discredits each and every one of those boys who were brave enough to step forward.
· 1985 – A follow up meeting takes place at the home of Rabbi Simcha Kaufman and includes Rabbi Kaufman, Rabbi Lipa Margulies, Rabbi Shia Fishman, an Askan and an eyewitness. The eyewitness recounts his personal knowledge of Rabbi Kolko’s sexual abuse of boys and discusses the information he had gleaned from others. Rabbi Lipa Margulies insists that the charges are all fabrications and attacks the reputations of everyone involved in seeking the removal of Kolko from his Yeshiva Torah Temimah. Rabbi Shia Fishman subsequently informs anyone who asks that he can not deal with this issue as he is old (50 at the time) and will lose his job if he pursues this matter.
· 1985 – Rabbi Moshe Scheinerman is offered a lucrative and prestigious position as Rav of a Shul (a position he holds to this day) and is told that he must cease and desist from his actions against Yeshiva Torah Temimah Rabbeim (his own words) which he promptly does. Scheinerman abandons ship explaining that it is not appropriate for a rabbi of his stature to deal with these matters. Rabbi Yehoshua Leiman takes over.
· 1985 - Rabbi Yehoshua Leiman and others continue their quest for a solution and convene a Bais Din for this purpose. This Bais Din, consisting of Rabbi Menashe Klein, Rabbi Yechezkel Roth, Rabbi Aharon Stein, Rabbi Moshe Stern and Rabbi Chaim Yankel Tauber, is scheduled to hear testimony for two days after which they will rule on how to proceed. This panel meets and hears testimony for one day. Shortly thereafter, Rabbi Moshe Stern states that he is unable to participate in any more sessions and this Bais Din is disbanded without further explanation. In a private conversation with one of the Askanim, Rabbi Stern disclosed that he had been approached by Rabbi Lipa Margulies which resulted in the discontinuance of the Din Torah.
· 1985 – Upon the dissolution of the above Bais Din, Rabbi Lipa Margulies retains Rabbi Pinchus Scheinberg to convene a second Bais Din for the purpose of clearing Rabbi Yehuda Kolko’s name. Rabbi Lipa Margulies then drafts Rabbi Friedman (the Tenka Rav) and Rabbi Shlomo Zalman Brown to serve on Rabbi Scheinberg’s Bais Din. Prior to convening the Bais Din, Rabbi Pinchus Scheinberg speaks with several of Kolko’s victims and asks them to describe what Kolko has done to them. Upon hearing the allegations Rabbi Scheinberg informs the boys that in the eyes of Halacha they had not been molested. Rabbi Scheinberg also calls the Askanim and tells them to cease and desist in their attempts to remove Kolko from Chinuch. Rabbi Avigdor Miller disagrees and instructs the Askanim in no uncertain terms to do whatever must be done to protect children from Kolko. Rabbi Pinchus Scheinberg convenes the Bais Din and takes the position that Rabbi Kolko has a Chezkas Kashrus absent any testimony by two adult witnesses to any single event. Rabbi Friedman takes the position that in light of the persistent rumors Rabbi Kolko must be kept away from children. Rabbi Brown ultimately concedes that there is no Halachic evidence against Kolko and the Din Torah is concluded. Rabbi Lipa Margulies insists that he has a Psak from this Bais Din but to this day has refused to produce it. Regardless, it is of note that no victims testified before this Bais Din.
· 1987 – Rabbi Yehuda Kolko, having groomed a former first grade student of his for years, begins systematically sexually abusing this boy (name withheld at the request of the victim) both in and out of the Yeshiva Torah Temimah building. When this boy complains to Rabbi Lipa Margulies that his grades are slipping because Kolko is removing him from class almost daily, Margulies responds by slapping the boy across the face and throwing him out of his office. This young man is now living down south where he is on leave of absence from the U.S. Army.
· 2001 – Rabbi Yehuda Kolko, takes a young Yeshiva Torah Temimah student under his wing (name withheld at the request of the victim) and begins removing him from class for “special projects.” These special projects include the boy being sexually molested by Kolko in the basement of the Yeshiva, in Rabbi Kolko’s car and in Rabbi Kolko’s private office, which Rabbi Lipa Margulies has conveniently equipped with its own private bathroom. This young man is currently in therapy and hopes to be able to recover enough to be able to get married and start a family.
· 2005 – Dovid Framowitz, after years of searching on the internet, chances upon a post written by a blogger calling himself “Un-Orthodox Jew” which makes reference to Rabbi Lipa Margulies harboring Rabbi Yehuda Kolko, a known pedophile, in his Yeshiva Torah Temimah. Dovid begins communicating with this blogger via e-mail who in turn posts Dovid’s story on his blog. Over the course of several months other victims of Kolko begin to step forward with their stories.
· January 2006 – Several Askonim decide that this four decade long Chillul Hashem must stop and approach both Rabbi Yehuda Kolko and Rabbi Lipa Margulies with a demand that Kolko be removed from Yeshiva Torah Temimah and Camp Silver Lake and further commit to spending the rest of his life in treatment and away from children. Both Kolko and Margulies refuse.
· February 2006 – A letter is drafted informing the public that Rabbi Yehuda Kolko is a dangerous pedophile and that Rabbi Lipa Margulies continues to employ him despite his knowledge of this fact. Copies of this draft letter are delivered to Kolko and Margulies. Both Kolko and Margulies are offered the opportunity to deal quietly with the issue and are informed that if they continue to refuse, the letter would be mass mailed to the entire community. Kolko responds by stating that “the matter has been taken care of” and Margulies responds by asking if anyone “thinks Kolko is still a threat” and declares “if anyone does not like the way I run my yeshiva let them not send their children to my yeshiva.” They refuse to comply and the letter is sent out in a mass mailing.
· February 2006 – Eli Greenwald, a graduate of Yeshiva and Mesivta Torah Temimah, son of one of the founders of the Yeshiva and a parent in the Yeshiva receives the letter and spends a few days investigating the matter. He calls Rabbi Yaakov Applegrad, the Yeshiva’s Administrator, and requests a meeting of the Vaad HaHorim in order to address this serious issue. Rabbi Applegrad informs him that there will be no meeting as the allegations are false and that he and Rabbi Margulies have the matter under control. Mr. Greenwald called Rabbi Lipa Margulies and makes the same request of him. Rabbi Margulies responds by shouting at him.
· February 17, 2006 – Eli Greenwald is served with a Hazmana issued by Rabbi Yisroel Belsky calling him to a Din Torah to answer the charge of Hotzoas Shem Rah allegedly committed against Rabbi Yehuda Kolko. Mr. Greenwald responds on February 21, 2006, that he will appear for a Din Torah before the Bais Din of America. To this day there has been no reply to Mr. Greenwald’s response by either Kolko or Rabbi Yisroel Belsky.
· February 2006 – An Askan meets with Rabbi Yaakov Perlow and pleads with him to get involved in this matter. Rabbi Perlow refuses on the basis of his being a Yuchid and this being a Tzibur matter. After being pressed further Rabbi Perlow takes his final stand that this is a Flatbush matter and as he is a Boro Park Rabbi it would be unseemly for him to get involved in this matter.
· March 2006 – Rabbi Lipa Margulies reaches a standstill agreement with the Askonim by committing to appear before a panel consisting of two Rabbonim and one Frum lawyer, all three of whom had been chosen by him. Rabbi Lipa Margulies reneges on his promise to appear before this panel.
· March 23, 2006 – A Hazmana to a Din Torah is sent to Rabbi Yehuda Kolko, Rabbi Lipa Margulies and Yeshiva Torah Temimah summoning them to a Din Torah before the Bais Din of Mechon L’Hoyroa or a Bais Din of ZBLA. The Hazmana is ignored by all the defendants.
· March 30, 2006 – A second Hazmana to a Din Torah is sent to Rabbi Yehuda Kolko, Rabbi Lipa Margulies and Yeshiva Torah Temimah summoning them to a Din Torah before the Bais Din of Mechon L’Hoyroa or a Bais Din of ZBLA. By fax sent on April 5, 2006, Rabbi Lipa Margulies responds to this Hazmana stating he will not appear for a Din Torah “without a prior determination of the charges against Rabbi Kolko.” Rabbi Kolko continues to ignore the Hazmanas.
· April 6, 2006 – A third Hazmana to a Din Torah is sent to Rabbi Yehuda Kolko, Rabbi Lipa Margulies and Yeshiva Torah Temimah summoning them to a Din Torah before the Bais Din of Mechon L’Hoyroa or a Bais Din of ZBLA. By fax sent on April 10, 2006, Rabbi Lipa Margulies responds to this Hazmana by stating “the Hazmonah that you sent to us was not a valid Hazmonah.” Rabbi Kolko does not respond at all. It is of note that Rabbi Yehuda Kolko is still teaching in Yeshiva Torah Temimah while these exchange are taking place.
· May 4, 2006 – A lawsuit is filed in United States District Court: Eastern District of New York, naming Rabbi Yehuda Kolko; Yeshiva & Mesivta Torah Temimah, Inc. and Camp Agudah as defendants. Rabbi Yehuda Kolko remains in the classrooms of Yeshiva Torah Temimah.
· May 5, 2006 – Rabbi Simcha Kaufman approaches Dovid Framowitz and with tears in his eyes tells him that if only he had known what Rabbi Kolko was doing to him he would have put a stop to it. Of interest was Rabbi Simcha Kaufman’s complete denial of any prior knowledge of any accusation before Dovid Framowitz brought his lawsuit. Rabbi Simcha Kaufman pleads with Dovid to withdraw his lawsuit lest he hurt Rabbi Lipa Margulies and the Yeshiva.
· May 10, 2006 – After being approached for comment on several occasions by Robert Kolker, a reporter for New York Magazine, and with a 5:00 printing deadline looming, Rabbi Lipa Margulies issues a statement through his attorney at 4:30 PM. Beginning with a proclamation that Yeshiva Torah Temimah is the preeminent Yeshiva in the world followed by an absolute denial of all the allegations, the statement concludes with an announcement that Rabbi Kolko has agreed to a “leave of absence” pending the resolution of this matter. Despite this claim, Rabbi Yehuda Kolko remains in the classrooms of Yeshiva Torah Temimah.
· May 12, 2006 – A second lawsuit is filed in United States District Court: Eastern District of New York naming Rabbi Yehuda Kolko; Yeshiva & Mesivta Torah Temimah, Inc. as defendants. Still, Rabbi Yehuda Kolko remains in the classrooms of Yeshiva Torah Temimah.
· May 15, 2006 – “On the Rabbi’s Knees – Do the Orthodox Jews Have a Catholic Priest Problem” a feature article in New York Magazine, a publication with a circulation of three million, is published. Within days of the publication of the article and after thirty-eight years of committing unspeakable acts of perversion in Yeshiva Torah Temimah, Kolko leaves the classrooms of Yeshiva Torah Temimah. It was only after the magazine hit the newsstands that Margulies succumbed to pressure and removed Kolko from the classrooms of Yeshiva Torah Temimah.
· July 2006 – Over the vocal protest of many residents and with the help of his friend Rabbi Yaakov Applegrad, Rabbi Yehuda Kolko takes up summer residence at a home in Regency Estates in the Catskills. Despite the claim that Kolko was on a leave of absence from Yeshiva Torah Temimah, he continues working for Camp Silver Lake, Yeshiva Torah Temimah’s summer home. In addition, Kolko initiates and organizes a multi-camp excursion to Lake Compounce, a water park located in Connecticut, where he is seen frolicking with young boys in bathing suits. A media outcry ensues resulting in Kolko being banned from the park by its non-Jewish management. Astonishingly, in August Kolko organizes a second trip to Lake Compounce, which is attended by the same Frum boy’s camps who participated in the July trip.
- December 6, 2006 – A civil suit is filed against Mesivta Torah Temimah in Kings County (Brooklyn) NY by the parents of a boy, now 9, who claims Rabbi Kolko abused him in 2003 and 2004.
- December 7, 2006 – Rabbi Yehuda Kolko is arrested in Brooklyn on criminal abuse charges.
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http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-3667308,00.html

Parents ignore child abuse at rabbi's advice

Police investigators stunned to find ultra-Orthodox parents ignored sexual abuse of their two children after their rabbi warned filing charges may invoke halachic rule equal to 'din moser'
Efrat Weiss

The Jerusalem Police recently revealed a stunning conspiracy of silence involving the sexual abuse of two children, ages four and nine, by a male relative. The investigation also revealed that the children's parents, their rabbi and their neighbors were all aware of the abuse, but chose to keep quiet.

Senior police NCO Aliza Aroch, who is the lead investigator in the case, told Ynet that police were contacted by a social worker, who reported getting a call from a woman who claimed to have witnessed the man molest the nine-year-old while they were at a doctor's waiting room.

Ordinance

Rabbi Aviner: Child abuse must be reported / Kobi Nahshoni

Prominent religious-Zionist leader lashes out at failure to inform authorities of such acts 'in order to have mercy on the abuser,' says 'first of all we must have pity on the helpless child'
Full story

The woman informed the doctor of what she saw and the two immediately contacted the social worker and the police. Both were deposed and the police promptly arrested the suspect.
The man, said Aroch, admitted the incident and assured the court it was a one-time digression. The Jerusalem District Court, however, ordered his arrest remanded for three days.
With the suspect in custody, the police began questioning the boy's parents and discovered that their nine-year-old son was suffering from autism and that they had two other children – a four-year-old boy and a two-year-old toddler.
After ascertaining that the suspect was a relative, investigators were amazed to learn that not only did the mother know the man was abusing both her sons, she had witnessed the acts on several occasions and did nothing.
She also told the police that her nine-year-old son had been subjected to the suspect's abuse since the age of two. The police suspect all three children also suffered physical abuse.
When asked why she did nothing, the mother reportedly told the investigators that she was "powerless."
During the course of the investigation, the police also found that several neighbors witnessed the suspect molesting the children in public, but failed to report him.


The children's father claimed that he consulted his rabbi, who told him that unless he witnesses the acts himself, reporting it would be like rendering a "Din Moser."
"Din Moser" is an ancient halachic law pertaining to informants, which according to the austere interpretation of Jewish tradition, equals a death sentence.
Once the gravity of the situation became apparent, the court ordered all three children be removed from home. The Jerusalem District Court also remanded both parents for five days. 


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It is unfortunate that it has come to this. It is a big darn shame it has come to this. It is very hurtful that it has come to this. But yet, IT HAS COME TO THIS. It has come at the price of a GREAT CHILUL HASHEM. It has come to Hashem having to allow his holy name to be DESECRATED so that his CHILDREN remain SAFE. Shame on all those responsible for enabling and permitting Hashem's name to be desecrated! When you save children you save the future. You save the future you save generations. You save generations you save lives. You save lives you have saved the world!!!!!!!